Daniel Richardson
9 October 2017
Journal 6
The most important suggestions that I gathered from my peers had to do with developing my characters and explaining the significance of certain details that I included in my essay. For instance, I my essay I talk about the importance of tacos to my girlfriend, Justine and myself, and my peers suggested that I should include not just my thoughts, or my day, but about how her day had been. They also suggested at hinting my relationship with her family. Other than that, the biggest suggestions had to do with making the story flow more.
I believe the best suggestions that I offered my peers would have to do with either restructuring their thesis little. For some peers, I suggested adding more detail, more meat to their stories, for others I recommended narrowing down what they mention in their essay and only focus on certain details relating to those narrowed down topics. I must say overall, I truly felt invited into the households of each of their stories.
I believe that the most important feedback/discussion points that came up in our discussion, but not on our pages, were not the specifics of what was said itself, but the many different perspectives that we could see in living color. Instead of my group saying to me on the paper, “Hey add more about Justine here.”, I could hear each of their takes on why, and they we could collectively come up with the best possible solution to our dilemma. We may be able to spit out our personal suggestions on paper, but it is easier to put them together in person.
Looking back at the peer review comments, I think that my group did a more than thorough job of critiquing/suggesting, however I wish that they focused little more on my introduction, as I have reworded it three times since writing. However, I feel like their other suggestions were infinitely more helpful.

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B4r8vbvSCz6vTnBsUkZwLWZQMG8